Sunday, March 20, 2011

My Vomit in the Bucket List

When I heard the term "bucket list", I had to look it up.  I use a bucket for nothing but cleaning and vomiting, both of which I detest, and both of which I sometimes do simultaneously, so I had no idea why anyone would be blogging about buckets.

So imagine my surprise when I found out that a bucket list is a list of things you want to do in your life.  Hmmm...I still can't imagine it associated with cleaning or vomiting but, whatever.  I don't make the rules.

Of course, I had to come up with my own bucket list.  Live in a new, beautiful house?  Nice, but not the first thing I thought of.  Visit Paris or Hawaii or Rio?  Again, nice, but not really my thing.

I swear to you, the first thing I thought of--the very first thing that popped into my head--was to have an entire set of silverware (defined as twelve forks, twelve salad forks, twelve spoons, and twelve knives) that all match.  It would be nice, but not necessary, if there also were a matching hostess set.

I just went through the spoons in my silverware drawer and found some stainless with stripes (I can't think of the right word for anything) down them, some with stainless beading around the edges, some with stainless AND gold-plated beading around the edges, and some hideous cut-out fancy things that look like my mother would have owned.

(If any of the above descriptions sound like your flatware, send me an e-mail.  I'm sure I have your missing pieces.)

WTH??  I'm a forty-two year old woman; I should have flatware that doesn't look like it came from the "5 for a quarter box" at the neighbor's garage sale!

How nice it would be to set a holiday table without pretending that the mismatched flatware is supposed to be that way and is "chic".

I have vague memories of trying to make this dream come true.  It just seems like the first time you're out of plastic spoons and you send the kids to school with pudding cups and real spoons, they get thrown out with the apples they never eat and become part of the landfill.

The very next thing on my bucket list that came to my mind is to clean my garage.

Yes, that is REALLY my 2.5 car garage.

As you can see, the bucket list will have to stop there because it will take me every second of the rest of my life to deal with that mess.

What's on your bucket list?

If you like what you read, go to the right and click the "Follow" button.  Even if you don't like what you read, please click the button anyway because I have self-esteem issues.

Post edit:  Okay, okay, I get it!!!  I'm an idiot!  The bucket list comes from the term "kicking the bucket."  And there was even a famous movie called "The Bucket List".  Duh.


  1. Dude. Saw your comment on my blog. Realized your's was a blog I had yet to stalk. Uh...I mean read.

    And now? I'm all over this here blog like a fat kid on an overturned Twinkie truck. Seriously.

    Love it! Love you! Think this is the start of a beautiful readership :)

  2. I am glad I found you. I have sterling silver flatware and quite a lot of it, all antique. And I love using it for holiday parties. I also have antique linens (table cloths, napkins) that are gorgeous. Oh, and lovely bone china and crystal by Waterford. Rather than being excited about my things, my kids would sell all of it at a garage sale when I croak. I'm making you my new heir. That will fix them.

  3. Oh, and baby, re-consider Paris. If I had it all to do over, I would have done it in Paris.

  4. I would like to own a bucket. I never seem to have one when I need it and wind up using a bowl or a big pot. I would also like to learn to climb, big things like Devils Tower or Half Dome.

  5. I seriously set the table for book club this week with all of my mismatched silverware and thought the very words, "Mismatched is supposed to be chic".

    I couldn't do it though.

    I took them off and put out plastic.

    What the heck. I already had out paper plates and plastic cups because I didn't have enough of those either.

  6. I hope you find some flatware that makes you happy! I recognize that garage. I had one just like it for a long, long time!